Welcome to Fayette-nam

I'm not sure if anyone still reads this or not, but I'm blogging at my own site now.

Here

http://my.opera.com/javaman/

Who he really is.
What he actually wants from life.
How to treat people, especially those he claims to care about.
What he really needs.
What he really wants.
How he actually feels.
How to stand up for himself.
How not to be so defeatist.
How to not keep him self so closed off from other people.
How to feel.

I'm in an utterly fantastic mood this morning for some reason. Can't argue with that.
:-)

Friday night is the Lord of the Rings Symphony. I'm so looking forward to it. I'm such a geek.

That you will never get anywhere in life if you don't fight for the things you want.
That taking risks is necessary if the desired objective is worth it, regardless of the outcome.
That even if you don't deserve a second chance, sometimes you still get one.
That you must do everything in your power to not waste that second chance.
That good things are worth waiting for.
That it's hard, yet very fulfilling work, to let someone know how much you care.
That I need to not worry and over-analyze things so much.
That I need to say what I am thinking.

Currently Listening to:

Myspace has been blocked here at work once again, so I think I am going to move blogging operations back here. I just hope people from myspace check will check out this one. Leave me a comment if you do, so I know if it's worth it.
Things have been going rather great lately. I met an amazing girl. Work is going good. Tim has been outpatiented.
ALL in ALL, things are awesome.


Currently Listening to:

Samiam - You Are Freaking Me Out



Currently Reading:

R.A. Salvatore - The Dark Elf Trilogy

that it is June already. I never believed the old folks, when I was growing up, who said that the older you get, the faster time goes by.
Well, old people, I am here right now to tell you that you were correct.
Now don't let it go to your heads or anything.

I'm listening to Robert Pollard's Edison's Demos right now, and you would be too if you knew what was good for you. As much as I love Guided by Voices, Bob's solo work never fails to astound me. This man knows how to write a song.

I still don't know what to think about Ryan getting married in January. There is nothing I can really do to stop it, but I don't think it is a good idea at this point in either of their lives. This is one that he has to figure out on his own though.

Apparently Shrub The Elder wants his other son to run for president now too. ugh.
I don't think things would be much better under the democrats, but at least it would be a change. It's time for a new form of oppression for a couple of years. I'm tired of the one we have now.

This is the longest blog I have written in a long time. I think I'll crosspost it because I like it.

Ok, so I suck at blogging.
So sue me.

Everyone does stupid shit from time to time. Myself included. We do things that hurt other people, and we do things that hurt ourselves. I held a grudge over some stupid shit that went on in high school for way too long. These were the kind of things that are earth-shattering to a seventeen year old. Now that I look back at it all, all three parties involved acted very petty, and I was the worst of the lot. I placed all the blame on one person, who really didn't deserve it. I probably would have done the same thing if our roles were reversed.
After Juddy died, it made me think about life a lot differently. The whole experience was a complete shock to my system. It made me wake up to what is actually important in life, the universe, and everything*. I don't take anything for granted anymore. I can't. Life is just too short. Living with regret and anger, especially over petty, meaningless, high school, bullshit is now way to live at all, so I don't anymore.
What happened can never be undone, but it doesn't even matter anymore. In the grand scheme of things, one girl is of miniscule importance, no matter how kick ass she seemed. Looking back, we both got played. It had to be even worse for you in the long run that it was for me.

Everything happens for a reason, and I think this is one had a very good reason. To make us the people we are today. To make us stronger. To make us friends.

So, Jared, if you are reading this, and I'll make sure you do, I apologize for never actually giving you a chance.















* I just couldn't resist.

Car drives through state senator's office

By Mark Hofmann
DAILY COURIER
Thursday, February 17, 2005

The Dunbar Township office of state Sen. Richard Kasunic will be temporarily closed.

The office was severely damaged early Wednesday after a vehicle went through two walls of the University Drive structure, coming to rest in a conference room of an adjoining building.

"Imagine my shock," said Kasunic, as he stood in an office with two large holes in the wall, a broken and toppled desk, along with shattered glass, notes, papers, insulation, vehicle pieces and other scattered debris.

Outside of the office was Kasunic's flattened office chair.

"I pictured myself sitting in that chair when it happened," he said. "Thank God nobody was here."

State police at Uniontown said one man was injured.

According to reports from the scene, a Ford Taurus driven by an unidentified driver veered off of Route 119 South, striking Kasunic's building.

State police at Uniontown have not released the name of the driver or any details of the accident as of presstime today. A representative from Fayette EMS said one ambulance transported a patient to Highlands Hospital.

Kasunic said the driver was a male and had cuts and bruises. He said the driver was not trapped in the car.

According to Mark Virgillo, captain with the Morrell Volunteer Fire Department, the accident occurred at 5:18 a.m. Crews at the scene spent an hour extracting the vehicle from the office.

Kasunic said state police informed him about the accident at approximately 6 a.m., and when he arrived at the scene, the damage was far worse than he originally thought.

The office was filled with unfinished paperwork, phone numbers and mementos highlighting Kasunic's 23 years of public service. Kasunic moved into the office in 1984, two years after he was elected to the state House of Representatives.

In January 1995, Kasunic was elected to a four-year term representing the 32nd Senatorial District. He was re-elected in 1998 and 2002.

The location, which also houses four employees, was convenient for people to come and go, according to Kasunic. He said he noticed an increase in traffic throughout the years and an increase in the number of motorists speeding along the highway.

"I always thought this could happen," said Kasunic, adding that the only other accident he recalls at the location is when an elderly man passed out while driving and his vehicle grazed the outside of the office.

Kasunic said the day-to-day operations of his facility will have to be put on hold until arrangements can be made.

"We won't be functional for a while," he said.

Not much of interest going on around here, as usual.
I just bought a memory foam pillow. It's my new favorite thing.
It's really nice waking up and not having my neck hurt like hell.
I go through pillows like a pothead goes through cheetos, though.
Maybe since I bought a better one this time, it will last a bit longer.

I'm going to a show this Saturday in Pittsburgh. Bunjie Jambo and Creta Bourzia. I've never seen Creta Bourzia before, but Bunjie Jambo is always a fun time.

My head hurts like something evil.
I wanna kick puppies.

Men charged in Pygmy goat's abduction

By Paul Paterra
TRIBUNE-REVIEW
Wednesday, March 2, 2005

Four Connellsville-area men are accused of stealing a Pygmy goat, killing it and trading its meat for crack cocaine.

Charles W. Smith, 48, and Charles W. Smith Jr., 20, both of 334 Breakiron Road; James Walter Albright, 37, of 291 Swink Road; and Gilbert Wesley Fisch, 38, of 270 Rear Dry Hill Lane, were charged by state police at Uniontown for their alleged roles in stealing the 4-year-old goat.

Police said charges of theft, receiving stolen property, cruelty to animals and criminal conspiracy were filed Tuesday with Bullskin Township District Judge Robert Breakiron.

The quartet allegedly took the goat the morning of Dec. 24 from Laura and Robert Locke's property on Englishman Hill Road in Bullskin Township.

Police said Albright removed the goat from a pen with a piece of rope, dragged it to a patch of woods and tied it to a shrub.

Albright and Charles Smith Jr. allegedly beat the animal to death by striking it on the head with a hammer and/or a steel pipe.

Police said the goat was taken to the Smith residence where it was skinned by Fisch and the elder Smith. According to witnesses, the meat was traded to a local drug dealer for crack cocaine.

It's been a while since I have posted a blog anywhere, so I am posting this on all three of my text blogs. Nothing has really changed around here. Same old, same old. I've had a general spurt of apathy lately.
I've decided to take both weeks of my vacation this year, instead of cashing one in. I think I need it. I'm taking the first week in April. I'm looking forward to it quite a bit, because the Pink Lincolns are playing here on the 21st, and I will get to go.

I've had my new phone for a couple of weeks now. I really love the little thing. I don't even carry my PDA around with with me anymore, because I really have no use for it. I'm going to keep it for a while though, because there are a lot of games for PalmOS that I like. I've found quite a few interesting games for the phone, though, including an MMORPG called TibiaME (http://www.tibiame.com), and an old school adventure type game called Atlantis Redux. It's really like carrying around a little internet terminal/computer with me wherever I go, and that is geeky.

Happy Birthday, bro.

I hate snow.
Yepp

I'm not feeling much better about things today. In fact, I think I am feeling a little bit worse.
I don't know what I am going to do to remedy the situation, because I'm not really sure there is anything I can do.
I'm pretty sure that no one reads this blog anyways, so I am just talking to myself. I guess it is rather therapeutic to get this shit out, though.

I'm feeling fairly crappy today. Not physically by any means, at least no more than normal. Emotionally I am a nightmare today for some reason. Maybe I have some sort of chemical imbalance or something. I really don't know why I feel like this, except for the fact that I am very lonely anymore. The last six months have just been utterly miserable. Everything that was important to me is gone. Juddy is dead. Nicci left me. Tim is in Iraq.
All I've got left is my family, and they are increasingly getting on my nerves. So I am slowly pulling away from all of it. I go to work, and spend the rest of my time alone in my room. I get by with as little emotional attachment as possible. I trust and feel for no one. The internet is really my only connection to the outside world that I don't instantly put up a wall against. I don't let anyone see how I really feel. Nobody cares anyways.

The phone shipped out today (Tuesday), so I should have it in a couple of days. I am such a geek.
The best thing though, is that being obsessed about stuff like this makes me forget how absolutely non-existant my romantic life is. Or maybe being obsessed with stuff like this is the reason it is non-existant.
Who knows.
I don't think I really care anymore.

is how I feel today.

As soon as my income tax comes in I am going to buy a new phone.
I'm going to purchase an unlocked Nokia 6620. T-Mobile offers the 6600, but the 6620 has is a lot more powerful, and has a lot cooler stuff. I won't be able to use the EDGE access, as T-mobile doesn't offer that, but it will still work fine with standard GPRS.
It runs Symbian Series 60, so there are a crapload of free apps out there. One of the coolest things about it, is that is uses the Opera webbrowser. I have used the SSR (small screen rendering) version of Opera previously on my now dead Sharp Zaurus SL-5500. It is the best small screen browser I have ever seen.
Here are some nifty pictures of the phone.

I'm going up to Indiana, PA to hang out with my brother at college Friday night. It should be pretty interesting. There isn't a damn thing to do around here that doesn't involve a 50 mile drive, so I might as well drive the 67 miles to IUP. Who knows, it could end up being a shitload of fun. Lord knows he has a lot more friends than I do.
I need to go to a show pretty soon. It's been way to long since I have. The good thing is, now that Ryan is 21, he can go to shows with me if he wants.

The speakers are missing from my workstation again tonight. Not having the distraction of music makes me go little insane, but that never really hurts anyone now and again. Sometimes I wonder if life wouldn't be easier if I was just completely bonkers. I could sit around all day and play checkers, drink Kool-Aid™, just do what I want, and have a nice soft padded room to go back to.

I didn't get home until after 4am this morning, and didn't get to sleep until about 5am, but for some reason, I was wide awake by 10am. While it does make me slightly cranky, it will work out better in the end, as I will be able to sleep better this afternoon before I have to go out for midnight shift.
Today is my little brother's 21st birthday. That makes me feel old as hell. I'm going up to visit him at college next weekend, and we are going drinking. Should make for an interesting evening, or two depending on how things go.

Now that I have looked around, I think I am quite fond of the way that this little site is set up.
Perhaps it will be my primary blog. I like that fact that I can email blogs in. That will come in handy when I get my new phone, as I hope to do a good bit of photoblogging.

w00t. I've got a blogger blog now too.
It would be hella sweet if my life was interesting enough to actually put good stuff in these blogs.