Welcome to Fayette-nam

Happy Birthday, bro.

I hate snow.
Yepp

I'm not feeling much better about things today. In fact, I think I am feeling a little bit worse.
I don't know what I am going to do to remedy the situation, because I'm not really sure there is anything I can do.
I'm pretty sure that no one reads this blog anyways, so I am just talking to myself. I guess it is rather therapeutic to get this shit out, though.

I'm feeling fairly crappy today. Not physically by any means, at least no more than normal. Emotionally I am a nightmare today for some reason. Maybe I have some sort of chemical imbalance or something. I really don't know why I feel like this, except for the fact that I am very lonely anymore. The last six months have just been utterly miserable. Everything that was important to me is gone. Juddy is dead. Nicci left me. Tim is in Iraq.
All I've got left is my family, and they are increasingly getting on my nerves. So I am slowly pulling away from all of it. I go to work, and spend the rest of my time alone in my room. I get by with as little emotional attachment as possible. I trust and feel for no one. The internet is really my only connection to the outside world that I don't instantly put up a wall against. I don't let anyone see how I really feel. Nobody cares anyways.

The phone shipped out today (Tuesday), so I should have it in a couple of days. I am such a geek.
The best thing though, is that being obsessed about stuff like this makes me forget how absolutely non-existant my romantic life is. Or maybe being obsessed with stuff like this is the reason it is non-existant.
Who knows.
I don't think I really care anymore.

is how I feel today.

As soon as my income tax comes in I am going to buy a new phone.
I'm going to purchase an unlocked Nokia 6620. T-Mobile offers the 6600, but the 6620 has is a lot more powerful, and has a lot cooler stuff. I won't be able to use the EDGE access, as T-mobile doesn't offer that, but it will still work fine with standard GPRS.
It runs Symbian Series 60, so there are a crapload of free apps out there. One of the coolest things about it, is that is uses the Opera webbrowser. I have used the SSR (small screen rendering) version of Opera previously on my now dead Sharp Zaurus SL-5500. It is the best small screen browser I have ever seen.
Here are some nifty pictures of the phone.

I'm going up to Indiana, PA to hang out with my brother at college Friday night. It should be pretty interesting. There isn't a damn thing to do around here that doesn't involve a 50 mile drive, so I might as well drive the 67 miles to IUP. Who knows, it could end up being a shitload of fun. Lord knows he has a lot more friends than I do.
I need to go to a show pretty soon. It's been way to long since I have. The good thing is, now that Ryan is 21, he can go to shows with me if he wants.

The speakers are missing from my workstation again tonight. Not having the distraction of music makes me go little insane, but that never really hurts anyone now and again. Sometimes I wonder if life wouldn't be easier if I was just completely bonkers. I could sit around all day and play checkers, drink Kool-Aid™, just do what I want, and have a nice soft padded room to go back to.

I didn't get home until after 4am this morning, and didn't get to sleep until about 5am, but for some reason, I was wide awake by 10am. While it does make me slightly cranky, it will work out better in the end, as I will be able to sleep better this afternoon before I have to go out for midnight shift.
Today is my little brother's 21st birthday. That makes me feel old as hell. I'm going up to visit him at college next weekend, and we are going drinking. Should make for an interesting evening, or two depending on how things go.

Now that I have looked around, I think I am quite fond of the way that this little site is set up.
Perhaps it will be my primary blog. I like that fact that I can email blogs in. That will come in handy when I get my new phone, as I hope to do a good bit of photoblogging.

w00t. I've got a blogger blog now too.
It would be hella sweet if my life was interesting enough to actually put good stuff in these blogs.